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T HIS IS UNLIKE any exam I’ve had at a doctor’s office before. I’m standing in front of an array of cameras wearing just my boxers, and a calm, disembodied female voice is giving me guidance: “We will start your scan by using 2-D, 3-D, and thermal cameras to create a detailed picture of your health from the outside.” Moments earlier, an IRL “medical operator” had taken my Neko waffled-robe and slippers and ushered me through the sliding door of the cylindrical chamber. “It will be very bright for a few seconds, so please close your eyes. Initiating in three, two, one.”

I’m bathed in warm light and there’s a synth swell sound effect…

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